Howie Mandel Pooped Today

On August 17, Howie Mandel pooped. At least that’s what his shirt proclaimed.

The America’s Got Talent judge and noted germaphobe stepped out in Pasadena wearing a novelty tee reading “I POOPED TODAY!,” accompanied by a cartoon figure celebrating his success with outstretched arms.

In black skinny jeans, white sneakers, and a pair of round shades, Mandel kept the rest of his ‘fit low-key.

I did some Googling to try and determine whether the actor and comedian has used fashion to allude to his digestive system’s ebb and flow on prior occasions. I couldn’t find anything that suggested so, though I did come across an interview in which Mandel revealed that he got poop on his hands during his father’s funeral in 2019.

A mourner at the senior Mandel’s shiva apparently ran out of the room mid-conversation, dropping what Mandel thought was candy — chocolate? — on the way out. Our bald friend reached down to retrieve the “candy,” only to discover that it was feces.

“He had a stomach disorder,” Mandel told Tyler Henry during an episode of Hollywood Medium. “It was poop. And my mom screamed and we’re screaming and she took me into the bathroom and she scalds my hand.”

This was probably nightmarish for Mandel, who is diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and doesn’t shake people’s hands for fear of germs.

Trauma aside, Mandel’s shirt — a mainstay of souvenir shops across the country — is pretty on trend, if you think about it. Tees bearing brassy phrases are the toast of Gen Z’s style set, enamored with Praying’s intentionally ironic “God’s Favorite” crop top and OGBFF’s “TITS FOR BRAINS” shirt.

I’m counting down the days ’til I see a shrunken “I POOPED TODAY” shirt in Dimes Square.

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